Friday, July 11, 2008
I have been thinking alot lately.
Too much time on my hands, I guess.
So much so, I have done things,
that have astounded even myself.
Thinking back, I realise that alot has changed.
Both things around me,
and myself.
A couple of days ago,
I had a late night talk with Byrne and Sew.
Somehow, it digressed into random talk,
and talk about confirmation class days.
Con 2 and Con 3 days mainly.
And something Byrne said struck me.
When I was in my earlier confi days,
I rarely smiled, or even talked.
I realised then when he said that,
that at that time,
I never really liked to actually smile.
Why, I don't know it myself.
And it wasn't only Byrne who has said this.
Quite a number have.
Shan't name them though.
And, it's true.
And, thinking some more,
I wonder when I actually started to smile.
And to laugh.
Laugh from my heart.
Perhaps, just perhaps.
It was when I went for Con 2 camp.
I got to know people,
people I didn't know personally,
people I have known from Kindergarten,
people I didn't even know existed.
We grew closer,
bonded over the stupidest of things,
the most random of things,
the most memorable.
Then, there was Con 3.
Playing pranks,
bonding even more,
bridging the gaps,
solving problems,
Sunny.
Haha, yes.
Sunny.
He's really one of a kind.
And then, now.
Koinonia, HALMM.
People, who I know truly care about me.
And who accept me for who I am.
Even though, I admit and agree,
I do not really show who I am to many.
Maybe it's trust issues,
or maybe it's just insecurity.
I don't know.
But, what I do know,
is that because of them,
I gained my true smile,
and my sincere laughter.
And, with Jarvis,
and Koinonia,
I gained my confidence,
I opened up.
Jarvis said many things,
things that struck me deep,
that truly made me think.
About who I am,
and about many other things.
For that,
I really thank him.
You all changed my life.
And for that,
I truly love you all.
I don't know what I'd be without any of you.
Each and every one of you.
Really.
& I sincerely love you all.
8:10 PM
